Chai

Today is my last day in England until Christmas. I've been here three months and will now go home and try to resume some sort of normal life, leaving behind a life here that makes me so happy. For three months I haven't worked nor have I had the same stresses that bother me at home. I've spent summer committed to enjoying myself; I've started art projects I never thought I'd begin, I've had time to write and things to write about. I've begun to see a path I might want to wander towards in life.

As I go home and try wrestle with the idea of returning to normal life I think of the things I look forward to about coming back to Seattle:

• The naked spa- my sister, Delilah, and I have a date first thing when I get back.
• The baked eggs at Oddfellow's cafe where I have breakfast once a week with my mom, a time we call "smack talk".
• Smack talk
• Whidbey Island
• Mexican food. There is none here.
• Driving
• My sister, mother, father, Lola, Lolo, aunts, uncles, friends

At home I have things I do, routines and rituals I get into to make the passing of day to day life more comfortable. I'll have baths and face masks, I'll read books and write in coffee shops, I'll buy unnecessary toiletries and beauty products at PCC. When I feel lonely I'll eat meals with the various members of my family. I'll be in the company of the friends I love dearly again.

I once heard on NPR that Americans believe that happiness can be equated to fun, but that happiness and fun are actually two completely different things. Fun is fleeting, happiness is long term. It leads people to believe that if they're not constantly having a great time, then they are not happy. This state of mind, the pressure to have fun, actually leads to us being less happy. That's why I think having small joys I can count on throughout the day makes me feel more fulfilled. 

Tea rituals are prevalent throughout the world and throughout history. From China where it originated, to England, the country that made it globally popular, tea is a big deal culturally. This extends to coffee, especially for Americans and other parts of Europe. People like to gather around a warm drink: go out for a tea/coffee, finish dinner with an espresso, or have a hot tea before bed. I always love going to my Aunt Madeline's house because after dinner we'll almost always have tea and chat or play a game like cards or Bananagrams (a more fun version of scrabble), If we're lucky, she'll make chai. It's a nice way to wind down the evening. It keeps people at the dinner table, extending the evening nicely, when otherwise we might retire to tv or phones. 

This is my Aunt Madeline's chai recipe. Her first marriage was to an Indian man, the wedding was held in India and while she was there she learned to cook some amazing food from her husband's family. I never thought I liked Indian food much until I started eating it home cooked at Madeline's house. Indian food is so much more varied than what you'll find in most restaurants. The same can be said for chai; a drink most Americans get from Starbucks. I have always hated this imitation version usually made from a syrupy concentrate or powder and then mixed with steamed milk. I thought this was the best chai could be until Madeline made me chai made from scratch over a stovetop. This was different; it was milky and mildly spicy, and sweet in just the right way. 

Madeline told me that when making chai it is important to "tend to it" and that is a common phrase she was told while learning to cook anything. She was also told that you had to boil the milk twice in order to make sure it was safe. She still boils it twice now, in America, because it's the way she was taught. In India, chai is had several times a day. It is offered anytime there is a visitor and often when there is not. She told me she kept trying to refuse, saying, "nay, auntie" when it was offered to her and the offerer would always respond "Oh, but you must!" and this would go on until eventually one basically had a cup of chai all the time and no one was ever sure if you really wanted it. 

This recipe is loose, it was told to me without formal measurements. It can be adjusted to the way you like it; many people add ginger or black peppercorns, I prefer it this way. I had a hard time learning the recipe because Madeline always just told me she did it by feel and look. It took many times of watching, writing it down and taking pictures of the amounts of ingredients for me to understand exactly how to make it. 

Chai

Serves 4 

Total time: 30 minutes

Ingredients:

4-5 cups water

8 cardamom pods, cracked open slightly with a mortar and pestle

6 cloves

A little less than 1 Tbsp fennel seeds

1 large or 2 small cinnamon sticks

2 black tea bags or 1-2 tbsp loose leaf tea

2 cups of milk

Sugar to taste, about 2 Tbsp to start

Method:

Put the water in a saucepan over high heat and add the cinnamon sticks, cloves, fennel, and cardamom. Bring to a boil and let boil about 10 minutes. Add the tea and boil another 3 or so minutes. (By this time the water will have evaporated significantly and when you add the milk you should effectively try to almost double the liquid.) Add the milk and bring to a boil. Take off the heat until its stops boiling. Return to heat and bring to a boil again. Strain and serve.